Decisions Decisions

Recently I had a long conversation with a close friend who had a decision to make, a decision that could have a negative affect for other people, but if it wasn’t made, could have a negative effect on her!

Her decision was for her – to enable her to concentrate on her – BUT making that decision was proving to be harder than she had realised.  Some restless nights of ‘what if’ and ‘what will they do now’ - ‘will they cope’ – ‘am I just being selfish!’ scenarios had become too much to bear. So she calls and asks if we can have a cuppa?  Always up for a cuppa, I - of course – agree. I bring biscuits, because we all know nothing as important as a decision can be made without biscuits! 

Now! As women, you all know we don’t ever just enter into – the reason – no! We have a good old chat about the house - the weather - the dog (OMG the adorable but oh so smelly farting dog lol) then seamlessly we
start to deal with the matter in hand, covering the facts, the actions, the consequences. Picking apart every ‘What if?’ ‘What about?’ ‘When + Why’

We also seem to cover so many other points such as, ’how did you know her?’ and the story about when I first stepped into the voluntary sector? Funny how we women can cram SO much in one conversation, we really should rule the bloody world! 

A plan of action is needed now!  It’s something to focus on; something to head toward, something my friend knows she has to do in order to see her decision through. 

After each point we discuss the possible and actual consequence of that particular action, we do this because we care about everyone directly as well as indirectly affected. 

It takes a long time to get to the point where my friend feels in better control to make her decision for her. SO! I’m left feeling an even greater admiration and respect for her than before because she could have simply made her decision and walked away to start doing something just for her but she didn’t, she made sure everyone else would be ok first. 

So even when we – as individuals – need to make decisions that will help us, it seems we – as women – first pay more attention on how it will affect others and whilst that can take more out of you than it really needs to, I for one hope I too am always as considerate. It costs nothing but can make so much difference to others.

Anyway, four and a half hours later I leave – Biscuits all gone so no reason to stay eh! lol